EVEN MOTHER TERESA HAD TO PRAY---------ANYWAY------ SOMETIMES

I have been thinking and writing about prayer more than I have actually been praying. It happens. Many devout people struggle with times of huge doubt and
lousy prayers.  It is kind of a natural expectation in the life of anyone who has some kind of prayer/meditation practise.

I know what satisfying prayer feels like to me.
There is a sense of timelessness
I experience a kind of contentment that has nothing to do with my life.
Gratitude permeates the moment
I feel open to a kind of guidance
There is excitement and anticipation about life to come.
And there is a feeling of strength no matter what does come

Good stuff, huh?
But lots of times I skim over devotional books with boredom
I can't stop my monkey mind
I play solitaire instead because I use my iPad for writing reflections and the games are right there!
I look to see what celebrity wore what dress to what event.

So I was glad to be able to dig deep and hold still today.
And find my sweet spot of prayer
Talking and thinking about prayer is so different from actual prayer
It's kind of a pain to describe because it is impossible
Words just don't cut it
But I try 

I WONDER WHO YOU ARE

Who are you who read this blog?

--Are you an official "none"?  This is the largest growing religious group (or non-group) in Europe and the US.  It is the people who when asked in a census, who declare themselves as NON-affiliated to any religion.  Therefore the designation--"nones".  I'll be talking more about this phenomenon. It matters in many ways.  But first------

--Are you a church goer who takes a lot of the theology and tradition with a grain of salt?

--Are you a man, woman, old, young?

--Are you indifferent or disillusioned about religion.  Which?

--Do you pray and laugh at yourself for praying

--Do you believe in Michelangelo's God unfurling among the clouds in heaven?

--Are you curious about the relationship between religion and science.  Does the topic of evolution make you nuts one way or the other?

--Do you wish you had a fervent faith or belief

I had no idea that scribbling a few prayers/reflections down on a legal pad would lead to a book about the kind of questions I ask above. I am interested in you and what you think and feel and question and know and don't know. I'm ready for conversation.

TO AFFILIATE OR NOT AFFILIATE??

I PRAY ANYWAY

Here’s what excites me about those of us who are praying anyway, not with skeptical doubt but with a sense of adventure that something new is coming.

I see the smattering of the topic (which I’m still not sure how to name)

in different venues all of the time showing the growing interest and growing numbers of the spiritually oriented but non-affiliated—the “nones”.  What a name! 

I am surprised by readers of my book who ARE affiliated with a church or religious institution but who are bothered by not being able to jump in with both feet to the professions of faith that they take with a grain of salt or a cosmic shrug. It feels awkward and false in a situation where one wants to ring as true as possible.  Perhaps it is an issue of too much intellectual honesty when faith is not of the brain. Frankly, thinking and feelings are not in opposition to faith. The divine is a totally different realm. 

SO I am affiliated.  I have found a place that is my spiritual home base. I mention it in my book. I am a member of The Green Memorial AME Zion church of Portland Maine.  I search and explore and question and enjoy being grounded in one place that I trust. I trust the people and the Pastor AND I trust their faith and so can explore mine with honesty. 

THANK YOU ARIETTE

My book is now for sale on Amazon.
That feels good to say.

Here's what I'm enjoying about having the book bought and read:

--So fun to hear what people get out of the book because what they like is often quite different from one another.  One will like it from a women's point of view. Another group will like it because they are jaded about any kind of religion and the book is somehow refreshing. Most feel relieved to have their own ambivalence voiced and validated.

--It seem that readers realize we are in a big moment of transition in the world and among all religions and that the trick is to allow everyone to be right and not to decide rightness with any kind of bloodshed  We have to be grown-ups on this globe

--People laugh with me (maybe at me-could be) and that gives them some comfort and freedom to be a messy real human being.

--The book is starting great conversations among the craziest bunch of different people and that just makes me happy. Wouldn't it be funny to be bound together in ambivalence with everything else wildly not compatible. That makes me laugh

I'm back from a month long Sabbatical. Feels good.  
And the book is I PRAY ANYWAY: Devotions for the Ambivalent